Sunday, October 31, 2010

Happy Halloween!

My daughter Skowt and her friends are part of a group at school called "Students 4 Service".  They do service projects, volunteer their time and fund raise for different causes.

Each year the teacher has them Trick or Treat for change and they donate all the money they collect to the local food pantry.  Skowt and three friends went out last night in our neighborhood.  I'm proud to say that in just 2 short hours they collected almost $200!!  They got some candy too...Bonus!

At one of the houses a guy threw in 3 bills.  Well, as the girls walked away they realized one of them was a 100 bill and not a single like the other two.  They quickly discussed it among themselves and went right back to the house and asked the guy if he meant to put that in there.  He of course did not, he thought it was a 3rd single and thanked them for returning it.  He said he would have given them about $20 to start but saw that he only had a couple small bills.  So proud to hear that they were all honest and returned the money.  Guess, I'm doing something right!

Was a little disappointed to hear how rude some people were to them though!!  One woman, as soon as she saw them at the door said "I wasn't planning on giving any candy to teenagers!" 
What has she got against them?  Would she rather they were out causing trouble??  Once they explained what they were doing she did change her idea of them and gave them some money.  sheesh.
Another guy yelled to his wife from the background not to give them money cuz they were probably just gonna keep it for themselves and buy booze.  Excuse me??  Of course when I asked my daughter what house he was at she "forgot". 

Here are my kids dressed up last night for Trick or Treating....

She was going for Lady GaGa but we had to work with what we had! 

The Mad Hatter

Happy Halloween!!

Saturday, October 30, 2010

Why I've Been MIA

It seems like I go in spurts on this blog.  I post quite a bit for a time then go a long time with nothing or very little.  Usually it's because of blogger's block, having nothing I feel worthy of blogging about.  But sometimes it's because I just don't feel like blogging.  Like has been happening lately.  We've been having some issues going on in our family that have made me emotional and I don't feel like blogging, much less anything else.  So as I've said once before what's a blog about my life without sharing the bad along with the good?  So I thought it was time to share what's been going on so I can get on with it, move past it and have fun blogging again because I did have some other blogging ideas.  I'll try to keep it brief.

First, remember back in April when I talked about our vacation curse and my mom getting sick in TN?  Well, once she got back they gave her more antibiotics and drained the cyst or whatever it is and thought she was good.  Her doctor wanted to follow up in 3 months with another CT scan just to be sure and we thought all was right in her world.  Well, after only 2 months it started acting up again, turns out it started getting bigger again.  They opted for surgery to remove it, once he got in there he realized it was cancerous.  Obviously not what anyone expected.  Since he's not an oncologist he just took some samples and closed her up.  He got a gynecological oncologist (it's located in the area where her uterus and ovaries used to be) involved and she is now scheduled for another surgery on Wednesday, which will later be followed up by chemo and radiation. 

In the mean time I went for my annual mammogram on the 14th and they saw something yet again.  It's the same spot as always that was determined just to be some cysts/fatty tissue but the radiologist claims it's gotten bigger and recommended an MRI.  Well, before doing that I decided to call my gyno, see what he said and possibly go back to the specialist I've seen in the past before scheduling a super expensive procedure I may not need.  So I see him on November 4th.  Praying that it's nothing again.

And if that is not enough........while talking to my gyno I decided to let him know about the super heavy periods I've been having the past few months.  The I have to go home and change my clothes kind of super heavy.  He had me come in for an ultrasound.  They found 2 uterine fibroids.  Now in and of themselves they are not big deal.  They are very common, not cancerous but just make you bleed.  Alot.  But while doing the ultrasound they also take a look at the ovaries.  Turns out I have a Dermoid Cyst on my right one.  That has to be removed.  So I go in for surgery on Nov 12th.  That's what I'm concerned about.  There is a possibility that could be cancerous.  Again, I'm praying it's not.  While they are at it they will also be doing a uterine ablation to take care of the fibroids and hopefully control the menstrual bleeding if not stop it all together.  I could live with that!!

Anyway, don't look at this as a "oh poor me" post. I'm not going to turn my blog into a pity party.  I just wanted to give you an update into what's been going on with me.  I would appreciate a prayer or two and some good thoughts that my mom and I get through it all OK. 

Monday, October 18, 2010

Reading Rick's book

For the past couple of days I've been trying to read this....

Rick Springfield's autobiography, which was released on Tuesday.  I'm only about half way through it but my mind has been racing and I have some mixed feelings about it and just wanted to get some of them out.

I can tell you right now this post will probably be quite lengthy so if you don't have much interest in Rick, his life, his book or my thoughts on it you may want to skip this post.

Consider yourself warned ;)

For those who do want to read on I've tried to keep it pretty general and spoiler free in case you have not read the book.  The few things I mention specifically are already out there and have been discussed in the press etc.

So, even before I started reading I was having some mixed feelings about it.  I was excited to get it and read all about my idol.  But I was also a bit apprehensive because of the comments he'd made about even "die hard" fans being shocked by some of the content.  Did I really want to read it?  Would there be things in it that I didn't want to know?  Would it change my view of the man I've "loved" since I was twelve?  I'm trying hard not to let it!

On the one had I feel sad for him because of some of the things he's gone through.  All the rejection, loss, death, sadness and depression.  All the feelings of self doubt, self hatred, and lack of self worth.  All the moving around, always being the new kid and not feeling as if you belong anywhere.  Because I get that.  I've had many if not all of the same feelings myself.  Maybe not to the extent that he has but they've been there and many times still are.  I only moved once when I was a kid but it SUCKED.  Big time.  So I can only imagine what it was like doing it as often as he did.

But on the other hand, he's done some not so good things.  Things I normally don't condone and look down upon.  Things I would never have done myself.  But what am I supposed to think of all that?  I mean should that change the way I feel about his work?  The songs that mean so much to me and kept me going as a teen?  Many of which were inspired by these very things?  Things that happened in the past, many before I was born or even knew who the hell Rick Springfield was?  Can I keep the artist and the man behind it separate?

I dont' know.

I mean, there are so many other bands and singers out there with songs I like.  I don't know much if anything about their past, their personal lives.  They could have done some of the same things yet I still love the songs.  How about people I know in real life?  I'm sure many if not all of them have done some not so spectacular things in their past that I would frown upon but we are still friends.  Still family. 

So just because I chose to read about Rick am I supposed to give that all up because I disagree with some of his choices?  How can I?  His music is part of me and who I am today.  It got me through some rough times and I'm thankful for that.  It means the world to me.

Along those same lines, my husband did some pretty bad things before I met him.  Some maybe worse than what Rick has done.  Some he may never even tell me.  I know he's told me a lot but I still get the feeling there are things he's too ashamed to tell me.  But I was able to get past those things and fall in love with him.  He became my best friend and we've been married for almost 20 years and our marriage is stronger than ever.  So if I can get past what my husband has done, the closest person in my life, shouldn't I be able to do the same when it comes to Rick? 

I don't know.

Then on the issue of infidelity.....I haven't gotten to that part in the book yet but I obviously know it's coming.  I'm trying to decide just how I feel about that.  At first I thought well, that's between him and his wife.  If they are able to work it out and she is able to forgive him for it and stick with him then more power to them.

But then I started thinking about my own feelings on it.  If it happened to me I don't think I could get past it.  To me that intimacy is a very private, personal, meaningful thing and if my husband did that with another woman I would be crushed. 

I have pretty much disowned my father for the same thing.  I haven't seen or spoken to him in over 12 years because he wanted me to accept his new wife.  The woman that had a part in breaking up my parent's marriage.  So how do I disown my own father for it but overlook Rick doing it?  Because it's not personal?  Because there were other circumstances (alcohol) in my parents breakup besides just infidelity that are also part of the reason I haven't had contact with him?  Because it really has nothing to do with me and being a fan of his work? 

Again, I don't know.

The weird thing is, despite the fact I'm having all these conflicting feelings and wondering "am I still a fan, do I still like him, should I be thinking differently of him?", I'm still feeling "protective" of him.  He's had a lot of press lately and when I see an article or a comment on an article that is not so flattering or rude, that's shooting him down for some of these things or as many are, not quite accurate in the details.........seriously if you're going to criticize someone get the facts straight!.....I feel the urge to defend him. 
I'm also upset that I didn't get to go to the book signing at the Mall of America this past weekend like I'd hoped or that I am unable to make the two in Illinois this coming week. 

Does anything in the book change the fact that he and his music has meant so much to me over the years?  Does it make me a bad person if I still want to be a fan? 

Like I said I'm only half done with the book.  Maybe things change.  Maybe my thoughts will change.  We'll see. 

I guess now though after typing this all out I'm starting to realize we all have our own demons, faults and shortcomings.  Who am I to judge what he has done?  Or my dad for that matter? 

Now what do I do?   

Guilty and confused,

Monday, October 11, 2010

My movie watching challenge

Who is your favorite actor/actress?

Have you seen all their movies?  I mean every single one?  The crap ones they made before they were famous? 

How many people say oh, I love so and so.  I've seen all their movies.  But when you take the time to look you really haven't.

Anyway, where am I going with this? 

Well over the years there's been many actors/actresses that I've decided I liked and realized I've only seen a small portion of the work they've done.  So I thought it would be fun to pick one out and work through their list of movies.

I had run it past my mom and she thought it was a cool idea so we decided to do it together. 

Our first pick?  Sandra Bullock

Speed was on the other night and that's when I brought it up to her so who better to start with then, right? 

Keanu Reeves will have to be next ;)

Would you believe in a list of over 40 movies and some TV appearances there are only 3 that we have both seen? 

So we started with "Two Weeks Notice" since it happened to already be on my netflix cue.  One down 40 to go!  This could take a while!

Who would you start with?

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Introducing...........Wesley the Hamster

Well, she did it.  She wore us down and we finally gave in to getting a pet.  We talked her down from a dog though.  I just cannot see hubby and I with a dog!

So a hamster it is.  We kind of surprised her.  She was talking about it for quite some time and kept asking me about it.  Well, I told her we had to discuss it with Daddy.  He works second shift so they don't see him that often but she would never bring it up to him.  I think she was afraid he'd say no without giving her a chance. 

So in the mean time while she was waiting for the day he was off and was going to bring it up I talked to him and we decided to go ahead with it.  We checked out some cages and ended up ordering one online because it was much cheaper.

She was so impatient waiting for that thing to get here!  Once it did she did a little happy dance and was ready to dig right in. 

But me being the all time worst at putting those types of things together and of course the mean mom that I am made her wait 2 whole days until Daddy was able to help her. 

They got it all put together Saturday night, then came the wait for actually getting the hamster.  We originally had told her we were going to get it through the humane society.  Well there really isn't much of a selection and considering the fact they only live 2-3.5 years or so getting an adult one means he's already got one foot in the grave!  lol

We went yesterday with the intent of just getting some bedding and stuff but ended up deciding to just get one while at Petco.  We narrowly missed purchasing a pregnant one that we thought was a male!!  While waiting for the guy to come back to help, she had chosen one because of the size and because we thought it was the only male.  She was checking him out and all of a sudden says "Ewww!  What's that he's eating?  It's all pink and gross!"

My immediate thought was not a baby hamster!  She said it looked like it had little arms.  So hubby got down to look and said that yeah it looked like a little baby.  The guy comes back asks if we had any questions and I said "Yeah, if this ones a male what's with the little baby it looks like it's eating?"  He was a little shocked, said he just cleaned out that cage and there were no babies.  He checked it out.  Yup, sure enough.  Female.  Just cleaning the baby, not eating!  Whew.  They had the tags mixed up.  So we chose another.  And he double checked the sex.  Hope he was right!

I wanted to get a pic of her holding him but of course he was a little skittish so we just let him be to get used to his new home.  BTW, if you've seen "The Princess Bride" you'll know where the name came from.  Though she didn't want to spell it the same.......the movie character is actually Westley, with a T.

Friday, October 1, 2010

Color me Purple!

I've been wanting to do this for a while now.

Finally had it done today when I went to have my hair cut......

Set up the appointment the last time I had it cut.  Kept it quiet from hubby that whole time!  Stopped by his work after I got out and he was a bit surprised but happy I had the guts to do something different.

I still have curl left in my hair but she dried it straight so you could really see the color.  There are streaks throughout but the right front area in the photo is the spot that stands out the most.

Now to get up the courage to get that tattoo I've been wanting.....